9 years ago our mum passed away. Her hand was held. The days up to her death were filled with visiting friends, she was never alone. The funeral was epic with friends, family, stories, fires and laughs. Nine years feels like long time and an instant all at once. At some point she will have been out of her children’s lives longer than she was in it, and that bit gets harder every year.
But we were able to hold her hand, share stories and mourn as a collective. I didn’t appreciate that for the gift it was until this year.
I want this pandemic over with. I’m tired of being a full time nanny, employee, cleaner and worrier. I cannot live up to the Pintrest Mums at the moment with guided learning activities, 24hour bonding and calm households. My children have stopped playing going to the supermarket and started playing ‘shhhhh Mummy’s in a meeting’. I hate that. I can hear the voice in their heads changing as my irritable tone comes out of their mouths’. I can’t give them everything they need right now alongside my employer, and vice versa.
I want this over with but I really, truly don’t want people to die alone, confused and out of fight with noone to fight for them. I’m glad for my Mum it was then and not now. So don’t let self importance take over, let’s just stay home and wash our grubby hands so this can be over with as quick as it can.
Thank you to the key workers keeping the country running and caring for those who have noone else right now 💙