An apology

We took the van to the Lakes this weekend. It took approximately 150 Tracker bars to get the kids round the walk and two grown adults to lift the all weather hunting dog on to the scary boat at the end. We passed sheep, drenched Duke of Edinburgh students, smug runners and more sheep. We... Continue Reading →

Simple, logical steps

Eight years ago my sister and her then boyfriend offered me the spare room in their holiday apartment. I tagged along with them and a group of friends, how hard could mountain biking be after all? We can blame quite a lot on that holiday. My sister got engaged on a mountain side. Things took... Continue Reading →

Lesson eighteen: Keep the pyjamas on

Mother [to herself]: Aren’t they playing nicely. I’ve nailed this. Mother [to children]: I’m going to get dressed my little cherubs, lights of my life, future of my world. Children: [Completely blank the person who gave them life] Mother leaves stage left Mother enters stage left Mother: Fucks sake (In the 30 seconds allotted for... Continue Reading →

Safety razor

This has nothing to do with dogs or dependents so if you came to this page for pics of cute pups and have found yourself reading about how I avoided a DYI labiaplasty, sorry about that.  I’ve been trying to swap out single use items for products with longer life spans so before Christmas I... Continue Reading →

Mr President

I’ve used this picture before but I thought it was pretty topical. This week the Leader of the Free World visited our tiny island. As this page is about dogs and dependants I’ll try to keep it on theme. My dogs are a very good judge of character. They are castrated and they love rolling... Continue Reading →

Motherless Mother’s Day

With Mother's day, my Mum's birthday and the anniversary of her death I'm not a fan of this time of year. I've been trying to write a post about her for a while but never found the right words or context. This week however I wish she was here and I want to talk about... Continue Reading →

The MD and the Unidog

One day the MD, the Unidog and Mummy took a walk. 'So kiddo, what type of cake would you like for your birthday?' asked Mummy. "Unicorn" said the MD decisively. 'That might be a bit tric-' "UNICORN" Mummy was silent for a moment, internally cursing her choice of words. 'What flavour cake' she thought, 'FLAVOUR'.... Continue Reading →

IS THIS YOUR TOOTH?!

Sometimes bad things happen to good people. Sometimes batshit things happen ALL THE TIME to the same person which forces us to question, why? What did you do to the universe? The family group chat this morning: Brother DD: Did you leave your son's tooth here? I've just found one stuck to my piece of... Continue Reading →

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